I have mentioned before that for my 21st birthday, many many and a few more years ago, the pastor and his wife gave me a New Century Version youth bible as a present, maybe they were hinting at something with it being a youth bible. Anyway, inside the front cover alongside all the presented to, by, on this date stuff they had inscribed 2 Tim Chp 1 – 6 & 7.
This is why I remind you to keep using the gift God gave you when I laid my hands on you. Now let it grow, as a small flame grows into a fire. God did not give us a spirit that makes us afraid but a spirit of power and love and self-control. 2 Timothy 1:6-7 (NCV)
It is because of that inscription 2 Timothy 1:6-7 has stuck with me all these years even when I wasn’t overly connected with my faith because I always thought that the pastor had judged me spot on. He knew that I was someone who preferred to be behind the scenes, in fact often hiding behind the scenes, and I was not the most courageous or confident of young Christians when it came to talking about my faith. Continue reading
It’s Sunday morning and I am feeling good because church starts in a couple of hours which means great worship and great preaching. Yet at the same time there is a sense of dread simmering up inside as I know I should get there early to join in the social activities before church but I never feel comfortable with making small talk. And I know after we have sung the first couple of songs we will be told to turn around and greet someone nearby, and that means more small talk. And then there is the social bit afterwards as people mill around enjoying coffee and more small talk. You see it isn’t that I am anti-social, I genuinely like people, but I am an introvert who suffers from anxiety issues, I’ve never been married, don’t have children and there are days when I get home from church exhausted by all the social interaction and small talk. To be honest there are times I get home from church feeling a little depressed because week after week I hear the call to be Christ filled evangelical Christians, go-getters for the Lord yet all I want to do in that moment is retreat, shut myself off from human contact and have some solitude. Continue reading